I’ve racked my brain for years on how to cause life to happen, as opposed to just letting it unfold. My successes have varied all the way from run-of-the-mill fulfillment to complete emotional turmoil. However, in recent past, I’ve come across a few critical distinctions to salvaging precious energy while making life work—most notably with the people in. If you look at the human condition, we weren’t trained to care for others. With the primary function of the brain set in survival mode, it’s not natural for us to be around others. Yet, it’s essentially impossible to live a fulfilling life on one’s own. As I’ve gone through the trials and tribulations of friendships, relationships and business partnerships, there are several scenarios that pop up consistently. Human nature is to handle it a certain way yet it often results in a severe loss of power or freedom in the interaction or relationship. Here are three common communication pitfalls that by avoiding, can save you copious amounts of energy to direct towards more important things in life:1. Taking Requests PersonallyIf you think about it, life is an ongoing series of conversational requests. Making friends, getting a job, and getting married are all instances where a question is involved prior to the life event happening or not. What’s important to look at, is how we make these requests and how we handle the outcome. It’s very natural to focus on the desired outcome when making the request however, it clearly deters the conviction behind the request. By remaining on the field and dialed in on what you’re committed to, there’s no attachment to the result—putting the other party at ease and free to choose yes or no. Moreover, should they say no to your request, you are able to take it for what it is. They’re saying no to the request, not to you. There’s no need to identify or associate with it because what you’re committed to supersedes all. It’s just yes or no — that’s it. If the answer fulfills on your commitment, great. If not, you go back to work. End of story.
2. Taking Feedback PersonallyOne of life’s certainties is you’re going to receive unwanted feedback. How you handle this forgone truth however, makes all the difference. Because we pride ourselves on our beliefs, many people automatically associate feedback as an attack. We think that someone giving us feedback is code for “you’re not good enough,” “you don’t belong,” or “you’re going to end up alone.” This type of neuro-association obviously doesn’t lead to very healthy responses, typically ending in communication breakdowns. A great way to overcome this default response is to flip the lense. Instead of viewing feedback as a personal attack, we see it as coaching. Very successful people view everyone in their life as a coach—someone invested in the improvement of a particular person. By viewing everyone who provides feedback—no matter how much we don’t appreciate its delivery—we view others as people taking on leadership roles in our lives. When someone volunteers to lead something, they’re taking responsibility for those they are leading. Great leaders don’t create followers—they create more leaders. 3. Listening To Our Internal JudgmentIt’s crazy to think just how often we take ourselves out of the game of life by simply staying in our head and listening to the ongoing judgment being recited. That inner dialogue is no genius. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. The only way we can create change in life is through action. Action doesn’t happen by thinking or feeling. They may be a prerequisite to a certain degree, but you can’t think your way into a promotion or a new relationship. You have to stay in the game. By acknowledging our judgment as unhelpful dodging of responsibility instead of a roadmap to situational success, we can remain present and distinguish the best ways to move the conversation forward. The default of the mind is not forward momentum. We must cause positive results.
Bringing It All TogetherLife wouldn’t be life without the challenging moments, however, we often make things harder than they have to be. We allow our view of things to dictate how we treat others in varying situations. By understanding the alternative views we can try on during times we typically break down, we can preserve energy better spent elsewhere—on making a difference for other people. The energy you save from not taking requests or feedback personally and quieting your internal judgment will light you up as much as the alternative typically brings you down. The extra energy you walk around with will be impossible to ignore, and everyone will want to know where they can get it for themselves. Leave the door wide open for you to be a leader for your community and facilitate a better future of human interaction with the people that matter most to you. How do you maintain your emotional energy at a steady level? Let us know your tips in the comments below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/life/stop-wasting-your-emotional-energy-committing-these-3-common-pitfalls/
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Some people still believe that you need to have the right conditions in life to be wealthy such as wealthy parents, attending prestigious schools, knowing elite individuals, working in high income jobs or owning your own business. This could not be further from the truth. There are plenty of individuals who grew up with access to the ‘right conditions’ who have absolutely nothing to show for it. Likewise, there are plenty of poor people who chose to ignore and deny their dire situation and do absolutely nothing to change it. However, there are many stories of ordinary people who became successful to prove otherwise. Every day you can read articles on Addicted2Success about entrepreneurs living on friend’s couches, surviving on a meagre income, working tirelessly for years on end to achieve their dream and persisting despite the never-ending challenges to finally come out on top like Scott Everett Co-founder of S2 Capital and Daniel Katz of No Cow. Irrespective of where you start, those whom create wealth are the masters of their universe. They believe in themselves and their life’s mission. They consciously choose to adopt a growth mindset and are massively committed to doing everything possible to turn their dreams into reality from becoming an international pop star, a New York Times best-selling author, a famous TV personality, or building a billionaire dollar empire.
Wealthy, successful people choose to create their wealth and are committed to managing their money effectively whilst poor people demolish their wealth at every turn by choosing instant gratification, adopting a scarcity mindset and mis-managing their money. What separates the two, comes down to three factors:
Below, are the eight daily habits that set the wealthy apart:1. Master of their universeTheir number one value in life is financial security over status. The wealthy understand that by building a strong foundation via small sacrifices creates a plethora of choices and ultimately freedom. Their money works for them as they refuse to live a life where they are not the Master. 2. Highly regardedThe wealthy know exactly what they want and have a game plan to get there. They believe wholeheartedly in their life’s work. They have high standards for themselves and others and expect people to adhere to those standards. They won’t back down from letting people know that they have disappointed them or offended them by their actions or conversations. 3. Self-AssuredActively invest and build their wealth via businesses, investment portfolio and purchasing real estate. It is through education, connections and research that the wealthy are able to invest wisely. If a mistake is made, they learn from it rather than allowing it to hold them back or repeat the same mistake. They are confident in their own abilities and trust their intuition. 4. IntentionalThey are committed and disciplined to each activity they engage in from gardening, investing, speaking at a conference or motivating a team. They do not tolerate others excuses such as: I am sick, I got stuck in traffic, I did not have time to resolve the situation, I’m sorry, I forgot to call him back and so on. 5. 10X ActionThey actively engage in 10x action and thrive on challenges. They will achieve more in a day than most people do in a week. A challenge to them is excitement, it is a game to be played and a problem to be solved which is how they end up positively impacting people’s lives.
6. Risk TakerThey take risks others are too afraid to such as borrowing enormous sums of money, investing in a risky business or purchasing a large piece of land to develop an empire, marketing a product that does not yet exist or taking a chance to work with an unknown professional as they realise their potential. They borrow other people’s money to invest in assets and grow their business. 7. Consistently spend less than they earnThe wealthy are experts in managing money and know where every cent of their money goes unlike the majority who fritter it away at every turn, not realising how much they are throwing away. Some may consider them to live frugally despite having millions of dollars. That is because they value and appreciate money and therefore more money flows to them, it is a constant cycle. 8. GenerosityThe wealthy understand that life is a two-way street and is important to be able to give and receive. Often, they focus on a few charities that are close to their heart and give alot of their time, energy and money to support the charity. They offer support by way of attending fundraising events, giving donations, hosting events, and becoming a member of the Board. Decide today whom you want to become and how you want to live your life. What is your dream? How many people do you want to impact? How could you build a talented team who love what they do? What inspires you to get out of bed each morning? How do you want to feel each day? How do you want to spend each day? What does an awesome weekend look and feel like? What drives you financial security or status, simply looking good to others? The bottom line is you must take action to change your life and choose to commit to becoming a financial warrior by knowing what you want, adopting a long-term game strategy and knowing that you have the power to live an audacious life. What habits have you adopted to achieve greatness? Comment below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/successful-people-create-wealth-poor-people-demolish-it/ Michael Phelps is a legendary swimmer who won 82 medals in his career, including 23 medals over the course of 3 Olympics. His coach, Bob Bowman, released a book in 2016 with many of the secrets to performance and excellence fueling the success of his many gold-medal winning athletes, including Phelps. He shares with us the method in his book, “The Golden Rules: 10 Steps to World Class Excellence in Your Life and Work”, a series of rules you can apply in your own life to achieve personal fulfillment and excellence. Here are the 10 golden rules for success from Bob Bowman:1. Have a vision“You need a vision of where you want to go, what you want to do and who you want to be someday down the road. Think creatively about what it is you want out of life and where it is you want to go.” Dream, fantasize and allow yourself to suspend your beliefs to envision the life you want. Put yours visions in writing. Dream creatively of the future you want and be open to lots of possibilities. Remember the vision should excite you and make you jump out of bed every morning to achieve it. 2. Be All-InThe right attitude matters which even Bob agrees. He says, “The right attitude, the All-In Attitude, can turn long shots into legends.” Use positive energy to go after your dreams. Double down on what it is you want, allowing no room for doubts or negativity. Bring enthusiasm to whatever you are pursuing. Be enthusiastic, take enthusiastic action and be enthusiastic about your vision. Be committed to forging ahead when you feel like getting out.
3. Be a risk takerAccording to Bob, “Risks provide the fuel needed to get on the road to… wherever you want to go.” Get out of your comfort zone and push yourself. When you don’t take risks and challenge yourself, you stagnate and get complacent. Turn risk-taking into a habit so you propel yourself forward to achieve your dreams. The more risks you take, the bigger your achievements will be. When you have an all-in attitude, it will become easier to take risks in pursuit of your vision. Practice taking risks and build up your risk taking ability. 4. Have a game planBuild yourself a foundation to achieve your vision. You do this by creating a game plan, or strategy on how to get there, for yourself. The extent of your game plan has to be how big your vision is. Make your game plan specific, well-thought out and ambitious. It’s a roadmap to help you get from where you are today to where you’d like to be. Work backwards from the grand plan that you have plotting out key dates, smaller goals and stepping stones to help you achieve your vision. 5. Live the vision dailyYou have to incorporate the above qualities every day of your life and keep your mission at the top of your daily agenda. “Success becomes routine when you have a routine,” Bowman writes. Create daily habits that push you towards your life vision and mission. Map out the day and try to stick to a daily schedule that pushes you forward. Go about the task at hand professionally, and set high standards for yourself. The more consistent to your daily goal work, the more likely you’ll succeed. Keep doing something daily but also ratchet up the pressure and challenge yourself to do a little more daily. 6. Have a teamHave a collection of personal coaches on your side. Bob says, “Look at the big picture and ask yourself, ‘Where can I be better and who can help me get better?’” Search for people who can help you, ask around, get referrals to help you build up a team of confidantes and supporters. Look for “like-minded” people who will be in the trenches with you when you face challenges and obstacles. Avoid people who will bring you down. 7. Stay motivated over timeFor you to stick to things in the long run, you’ll need passion. You’ll need motivation to keep going day after day since you might lose sometimes. To stay passionate and motivated, you might have to “fake” your interest until the sparks reignites the fire in you. Change up your routine to make things significant each day. Add exercises, outings, educational events, fun or celebrations to help yourself or your team feel more motivated. Use morale-boosting strategies to boost morale and encourage people to keep going.
8. Use adversity as an advantageDo not let one failure get in the way of your dream. Instead, use that failure to help propel you forward. Nurture resilience. When roadblocks come up, find alternative solutions, find ways to get through or simply to cope in that moment. Practice being in uncomfortable situations. Use tests, pressure, and rehearsals to practice putting yourself in uncertain and uncomfortable scenarios. Let go of disappointments and failures to move on to the next thing. As said from the coach himself, “Take something from failure and use it to move your vision along.” 9. Perform with confidenceAs you pursue each progressive goal, you will have more experience and continue building your confidence. Use each experience you have as a learning experience so you get better and more proficient at what you do. Stay focused on the task at hand and only take on what’s in front of you, not what’s in the future. Focusing on the task, not multitasking, is the key to success. As Bob says, “When you face a pressure situation, stay true to yourself and the plan. Remain in the present and do what you have worked weeks and months to perfect. If you follow this prescription, the desired results should come.” 10. Celebrate successUse celebrations as a marker of your growth and how far you are progressing. It’s important to acknowledge your achievements on your path to achieving your vision. Even if you haven’t achieved the results you want, celebrate the results since the Method strategies which Bowman professes is about the process of growth, not the end achievement. Along the way, you might have gaffes, blunders and setbacks as well. When they happen, you could feel disappointment and a sense that your dreams have disappeared. Coach Bowman’s advice to you is this, “Keep moving forward, like a swimmer with practiced strokes, and let the wisdom you’ve gained over time guide you. Your destination may be closer than you think.” Which one of these principles will you implement and how? Let us know in the comments below!from https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/the-10-golden-rules-for-success-according-to-michael-phelps-swimming-coach/ Online success is not all it’s cracked up to be. With it comes the biggest burden of all: requests for your time.
When I had this epiphany, I made the decision to start saying no to meetings. Meetings come disguised like the Big Bad Wolf out of Red Riding Hood as the following: · Podcast interviews · Coffee Catch ups · Phone calls · Product demonstrations · Joining Slack/Messenger/WhatsApp groups · I’m in town and don’t know you, but we should catch up” All of these demands of my time started to add up. Five minutes here. Ten minutes there. Before I knew it, my dream to inspire the world through entrepreneurship and personal development looked dead as a dodo. The 4-hour meeting request.Okay, this is not the name of Tim Ferriss’s upcoming book — it’s a coincidence. The other day, this dude at work sent me a 4-hour meeting request with 24-hour’s notice. When I saw the invitation, I instantly declined. Meetings that don’t respect my time or my colleagues’ time are declined — always. This meeting request was the trigger for the title of this article. It made me take a forced “Meeting Vacation” for one month. I said no to meetings for an entire month. It wasn’t easy and I thought it was going to be almost impossible to deliver on this promise I made to myself. Meetings have become a part of everyday life. Many meetings happen without us realizing through realtime message apps. None the less, I tried this meeting detox experiment. Before I tell you the result, here’s some thoughts to begin with:Thought 1: Just because everyone else is doing meetings, doesn’t mean you need to.Meetings are hip and cool. People say yes to meetings all day long without thinking why. When you challenge people to explain why they need a meeting, you figure out that often they don’t know. This means they scratch their own itch and talk themselves out of their own meeting. The meeting gets cancelled, I celebrate and fist punch the air, and everyone wins. Asking why messes up every unconscious thought. It’s the one question that can kill any preconceived idea or habit. ‘Why’ requires the meeting requester to go deep down inside their own skull and answer the question “What’s the meeting for and is it important?” Thought 2: When faced with the need to make a decision, many of us want to have a meeting instead.This problem occurs because we’re not trained to make decisions. We spend all of our decision-making energy on dumb stuff like “What am I going to have for lunch?” or “What should I wear today?” Meetings are a way to defer a decision to some point in the future when maybe we’ll all think differently, drive a Ferrari and have enough money that this problem won’t freaking matter anymore. I challenge everyone to make more decisions instead of having more meetings that don’t lead to decisions (okay calm down Tim, breathe). Thought 3: Meetings always take longer.· You’ve got the commute to the meeting. · The setup to the meeting. · The niceties like “How was your weekend?” at the start of the meeting. · Preparation for the meeting. I could go on for ages, but you get my point. Meetings are like a giant build-up that often leads to disappointment. If you think about the real time it takes to have a meeting, you realize why they are a productivity killer. The work that needs to be done to achieve a goal or set of goals requires time.
Count the real cost of time that a meeting entails, and you too may decide to do a meeting detox for a month. Here’s what happened when I said no to meetings for a month:I expected people to be pissed.I thought that the biggest challenge of no meetings for a month would be how pissed off I’d make people. I realized this was a nightmare that wasn’t true in reality. When you explain in detail why you’re saying no to a meeting, and you do it with respect, people understand. I even started saying things like:
So many meetings get declined for various reasons that the meeting organizer almost never takes it to heart. It’s standard practice that if you invite 30 people to a meeting, not all of them will show up. I decided to become a no-show statistic for a month where I was permanently on the didn’t attend list which was one person longer because I wasn’t attending — no biggie. The big moment for me was when I realized people don’t really care that much if you show up to a meeting. I thought they did care. I was wrong and so are you. Sorry. Blank space feels so good.Ever had a nice warm latte first thing in the morning? That’s what it feels like to start the day with no meetings in your calendar. All I saw for a month was my Outlook Calendar full of white space. The feeling was so freeing and I didn’t realize how good it felt until I did it. There’s nothing worse than waking up at 5 am (Australian time) to jump on a podcast at 6 am (USA time) when all you want to do is sit down and write or edit another blog post. Have a meeting with blank space instead and you’ll feel a whole lot better. You get to do things that really matter.Because I had less of other people’s meetings, it gave me time to tick off tasks that I had been putting off. I did the following:
These types of activities add meaning to my life and make me happy. Without the giant boulder covering the road that led to my goals, I was able to do things that matter. Executing on meaningful tasks is so much better than any meeting ever will be. The blocker to all business became apparent.When I divorced meetings for a month, I sat back and thought about business. I thought about all the meetings I attended in my career to date. During this wild west thought exploration I discovered that the cliché of “Meetings cost business so much” started to sink in. Most of the problems in business that need solving don’t ever seem to get resolved in meetings. Meetings from this point on started to appear as a blocker to creativity. Creativity, I’ve learned, is one of the best ways to solve a problem and unblock the flow of business. There was time to nap.I know what you’re thinking: “Tim, you lazy son of a gun. As if you have time to nap.” I normally wouldn’t have time to nap, but after taking a meeting detox, I was able to squeeze in a 15-minute nap. Doesn’t sound like much but it gave me an energy increase in the afternoon, when most people’s energy levels fall off a cliff (rescuing yourself with sugar doesn’t work either, tried that). The research on napping has been around for a while, so I’m not going to throw that dirt in your face again and expect you to swallow it. My only advice would be to trial it and then write me a nasty comment saying “Tim you A-HOLE you’re wrong again.” P.S — I probably won’t reply There was less gossip and office politics.Meetings can easily turn into a whinge session or a “Let’s complain about someone because they’re not here and can’t hear us.” By doing fewer meetings, there was less gossip. I didn’t have to fight the temptation to talk nice (we all face this) because I wasn’t there. I was politely declining and aiming for goals and outcomes instead. And other times I was doing things that really matter (like I said before). Meetings are a breeding ground for toxicity if you overdose on them. Somewhere along the way, that meeting you know you should have opted out of but didn’t, comes back to bite you on your well-toned gym ass and fill you with regret. Less Caffeine.Meetings often involve tea or coffee also known as caffeine. Many of us overdose on this addiction because it feels good (even me the Mr 4 am Habits Guy that’s supposed to be super disciplined). By doing no meetings, the decision to ingest caffeine became my choice. It was far easier to be disciplined because I didn’t have to fall into society’s standard of rolling up to a meeting and drinking what everyone else is drinking because “that’s just how we do things in Australia, mate.” I may be a descendant of Captain Cook and I may have worked next to Kangaroos (lots of them) for two years, but I’ll be damned, this no meeting thing certainly helped with the coffee/tea obsession that we have in this great country. Stress levels reduced.I’m very aware of my stress levels and no matter how hard I try, more meetings equal greater stress. Stress gives me brain fog (according to my doctor) and only makes the already huge problem I have with stress even worse. See, I have twice the amount of cortisol in my body than you’re supposed to have. I’m doing the best I can to reduce it and it’s working, but I found an overdose of meetings was definitely not helping the situation. Removing meetings for a month made me feel good. Published twice the number of blog posts.I mentioned this one already, but it was such a big win that I want to mention it again in more detail. By saying no to meetings for a month, I did more of the one thing that makes me endlessly happy: inspiring the world through personal development and entrepreneurship. In its physical, non-mystical, touchable form (if consumed on a ‘not so smartphone’) this looks like blog posts. I went on a freaking frenzy and wrote as much inspiration and life/career lessons as I could. Upping the number of blog posts allowed me to help more people and I got more messages of thanks and gratitude for doing it. This small feat may seem like total BS, but to me, it matters. You too have that one thing that has the same meaning in your life. It may not be blogging, but you have it — trust me. By quitting meetings, throwing them out the window, punching the air and charging forward without them, you too can do the work you were born to do. I’m not saying you should never attend another meeting again; what I’m saying is a meeting detox will help you see what time is being wasted and you’ll get better at saying no to the unimportant ones in the future. If you want to increase your productivity and learn some more valuable life hacks, then join my private mailing list on timdenning.netfrom https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/what-happened-to-me-when-i-said-no-to-meetings-for-a-month/ Today, being a “lifestyle entrepreneur” is the trend, and everyone wants to create a vehicle which will make them profit so they can have a beautiful, comfortable, and easy going lifestyle. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with this, but the greatest creators, innovators, entrepreneurs and leaders of all time thought and still think much bigger. They aren’t bought into the often times painful, lonely, and difficult entrepreneurial way of life solely to better their own situation and circumstances. There’s a greater purpose for them. Amidst our culture constantly telling us to look out for ourselves and go after what we want in order to achieve happiness, if you study those who actually are living life abundantly and to the max, you will see there are much bigger truths. Now I’m not saying it’s healthy to live in extreme self-denial only seeking the best interests of others and never taking care of yourself. However, building a business is bigger than just yourself because it brings others into the picture. If you look at some of the most well known, well respected, most impactful leaders and entrepreneurs, you see that they are more concerned with living an outward focused life. They desire to use the gifts and skills they’ve been given and the businesses they have developed to help others. Here are a few reasons why they use their companies and skills to greater serve instead of greater gain:1. They know the best way to leave a legacy is through serviceOnce you’re gone, no one remembers you by how much money you made, but by how many people you loved and helped. No one says on their deathbed “I wish I would’ve grown a more profitable company” but there’s many who say “I wish I could’ve helped more people and had more people in my life who I truly deeply cared about and who truly deeply cared for me.” The best way to leave a mark on this earth is through how well you love people. Entrepreneurship is a phenomenal vehicle to do this, because it allows people to be innovative, to solve problems for others, and to leverage financial gains to make a significant difference in other people’s lives. It all starts with the heart and the character of a person, and when those are in the right place, the power of entrepreneurship can take those intentions far. 2. They know focusing on serving others is actually more profitable than focusing on profitIt’s simple, the best way to make money is to figure out what someone’s problem is or what they want, and create something that’s more valuable to them than the money they have in their pocket. So by simply having a mind set that is focused on making the lives of others better, you will inherently figure out how to grow a better, more monetarily lucrative business. Focus outwardly, not inwardly. With this being said, if you’re only focusing on giving to and helping others just so you can receive in return, is that really genuine generosity? Will you be fulfilled in your business long term?
3. They change by helping people so they desire to help others moreLoving and serving others is the best way to grow. The main reason we are on this earth is to be in relationships. Everything else is supplemental to our relationships. Because of this, when you build a business around helping people, not only will you change their lives, but your life will change. Getting to know other people, learning their stories, caring for them, and loving on them, shapes us. Just because money is involved in business doesn’t mean you can’t build a business to help people. It doesn’t have to be a non-profit to be highly impactful either. The most impactful entrepreneurs know that living this outwardly way is an amazing adventure and that they will experience radical inner growth through it. Who doesn’t want to go on an adventure and grow? 4. They’re aware that if you live for the applause, you’ll die from the lack of itThose who want to build a business, or a personal brand, or become an influencer solely for the attention and validation will wither. They will live a roller coaster of a life. When the people are praising them, they’ll be doing awesome, but when their audience is gone or is in opposition to them, they won’t know where to turn or how to respond. On the other hand, when an entrepreneur or a leader has a mission, and a reason to serve, impact, and love other people, they’re so focused on a greater purpose that the outer noise doesn’t matter. They know that insecure people need to be served, but that secure people are free to serve because they know who they are. Don’t live for the applause, live for others.
5. They know it’s the most fulfilling way to run a business and to live lifeWhether you’re an entrepreneur making millions of dollars, or a person with a dead end job barely scraping by, living a life that is focused on serving, caring for, and loving others is the most fulfilling one a human being can live. Greatness is not about power or authority, it’s about service. You’ll never regret taking extra time or putting in extra energy to serve someone, but you’ll likely regret not doing so. The most loved and well respected people who have built businesses, lead the masses, and changed the world know they’re never too big of a deal to serve anyone. We’re all the same. When you can operate from these principles not only will your business have a better chance of flourishing, but you’ll be much more satisfied in your work, your relationships, and in your life. You don’t have to be famous or even running a profitable business to implement these truths into the core values of how you operate. Our inward focus usually leads to outward deterioration. Our outward focus usually leads to inward growth. Due to this, be focused on others, be different from the masses and be in services to others. How do you add value to other peoples lives? Let us know in the comments below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/entrepreneur-profile/5-reasons-why-the-best-entrepreneurs-use-their-companies-to-serve-others/ Do you think you’ll accomplish everything you want to before you die? Do you sometimes worry you won’t reach your goals? Do you have a plan to get what you want? If you’re like most people, you often have trouble squeezing in everything you want to do during the day, week or month, let alone everything you might want to accomplish in a lifetime. Updates from friends on Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat come in to your phone at all hours of the day and night. Invites to activities, events, festivals, etc. blow up your phone on a regular basis. At the office, things aren’t much better. Your Outlook inbox explodes with messages from clients, colleagues, or your boss, and everyone wants something different. You use multiple tools for managing your tasks, and every month something new seems to come out which promises to save you time and reduce the number of distractions in your life. Let me break the bad news, it won’t. The truth is, you have more time than you think to accomplish what you want out of life. As of 2016, men tend to live on average 69 years, versus 72 years for women. If most people start work at 18 and continue on until retirement around 65, this means you spend 47 years of your life working. You have, most likely, more time than you think to accomplish all that you want to do in this life. I urge you to slow down and take a few of these suggestions to heart as you think about how to get the most out of your days in the future. Here are 5 ways to make the most out of your time here on earth:1. Take personal daysThe idea of taking a personal day has been around for a long time, but few people really consider the value of taking one on a regular basis. Whether this means leaving work early on the third Friday of every month to do some “life-admin” or taking an entire day off in the middle of the week once a month to rigorously outline your plans and objectives for the future, the value of a personal day dedicated to reflection and personal development is completely underrated in today’s go-go society. I would urge you to set aside an entire day (half-days won’t work, as they are likely to be encroached upon) and make a concerted effort to spend that time reflecting about what you want to accomplish and the steps you will take to get there.
2. Structure in blank space for distraction free workWhile taking time off to plan out your life and checking your personal progress is great, it is also important to structure small blocks of personal “switch off” time to let your mind wander during the typical work week. This may mean structuring in “strategic blocks” of one to two hours as suggested by Brian Moran and Michael Lennington in their book The 12 Week Year, or it may mean making a regular habit of doing “30 before 7:30” (30 minutes of concentrated work before 7:30am each morning) as suggested by Mel Robbins in her book The 5 Second Rule. Whatever you do, make sure you allow yourself some distraction free work time so that you can get into the flow. 3. Leave technology behindWe are tethered to our devices like never before, and we are rarely out of arm’s reach of something that can connect us to anyone (or any piece of information) in the world. I say this with some trepidation, because I am not entirely pleased about it. Sure, it is fantastic to have access to a device that can allow us to order food, call a car, create a professional looking video clip or photo, and post updates online all in the space of a few seconds, but it comes at a price. Despite having the freedom to connect with anyone and do nearly anything from behind a touch screen device, we have effectively become servants for the same network of interconnected apps and platforms. So, at the risk of having you stop reading this article, I urge you to put down your device for at least 1 day a week and connect with people in more humanistic (face to face) ways. 4. Spend time with others not like youMotivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. Think hard about that, because it will help define how you spend the rest of your life. If you believe that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with, you will need to be careful that you spend time with people that add to your life, rather than detract from it. The more time you spend with people that come from similar backgrounds and share similar views as you, the more you will become closed off to the world around you. This is an easy habit to fall into, but it is one that can have dire consequences if you are serious about stretching yourself and reaching lofty goals. Go out and explore, and spend time with people that push you in new and exciting ways.
5. Have more funI have noticed more and more that people tend to take pride in how stressed out they are and how much they work when they’re in the office. They then swing to the opposite extreme during the weekends, getting belligerently drunk and partying or staying in and watching Netflix for 48 hours straight. This is no way to live. It’s easy for me to call out because, truth be told, I used to be this way. Too often, people find themselves caught up in a world that promotes stress, anxiety and long-hours as a badge of honor. Rather than promote and support this type of behavior by falling into the trap of stress and anxiety caused by overwork, look for ways to have fun in the moment. Talk to colleagues, give compliments, make connections, learn new things, and just try to connect with others. Remember, you’ve likely got around 65-80 years on this planet, you don’t want to spend the majority of that time stressed out, waiting for the weekend. Instead, take to heart a few of these counterintuitive tricks and embrace every day with newfound appreciation. You won’t regret it, I promise. How do you maximize your time? Comment below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/life/5-counterintuitive-ways-to-make-the-most-out-of-your-time/ Not everyone is accepting of mental illnesses, especially when it’s people they don’t know. However, it’s important to understand how to better handle mental illness in order to get ahead in life. Below, are the four best ways to better handle mental illness conditions if you consider yourself an optimistic person: 1. Be GratefulResearch studies have shown that being more grateful can make you feel happier, more positive, and better overall. Don’t focus on the negatives of your mental illness, instead, be thankful for all you do have. You likely have a lot to be thankful for like a warm bed to sleep in and a family who loves you. Even as an optimist, you may have a hard time celebrating the small things in life, but being mindful of your advantages helps. You can help keep yourself in touch with your emotions and feel happier by noticing when your life is going well. Consider keeping a gratitude journal. Overall, having gratitude and writing down your thoughts on some of the things you value and enjoy in your life, you can handle mental illness a little better.
2. Look for Professional HelpIf you seriously can’t manage your own thoughts and they’re interfering with day-to-day activities, you should consider looking for professional help. Therapy and counseling can help reduce your emotional suffering and improve self-growth with your mental illness. Try to find a professional who can help you understand your condition and keep your pathophysiological level. Here are a few other things that can offer you support when handling your mental illness:
3. Focus on Your StrengthsIt’s completely normal and only human nature to focus on the negatives in life, overlooking the positives that surround you. However, you can focus on your strengths and not obsessively care about the mistakes you’ve made. Doing this will only help project your life forward and give you the push in the right direction you need. If you find yourself having too many negative thoughts or thinking too harshly of the things you’ve done, you should take the time to pause and consider what you have done right so far. By doing so, you can look on the bright side of life and cope with your mental illness with ease.
4. Face Your Problems Head OnIf you’re feeling stressed out about your mental illness, it’s important not to sit and play the blame game, but instead, solve the problems you may be having on your own. Doing so will only make you stronger as a result. To solve your own problems, you should first write down all the problems you’re having. Putting your thoughts down on paper is much more manageable than having them circling your mind. Next, you should try listing a few solutions to the problems you’re having. Even if they aren’t realistic, just write down everything that comes into your mind, and you can judge the solutions later on. Once you’ve done that, you can start assessing the list you’ve made. Of all the solutions you’ve created on your list, write down the pros and cons of each one. Ask yourself how you want your situation to end and figure out the best way to get there. Remember, you only want to use reasonable solutions that won’t end in failure, or else you’ll only feel disappointed in yourself. Now that you have the solution to handle your problem, you should break them into smaller chunks to create a solid plan of action. However, you should also create some deadlines for yourself as well, to keep yourself on track with your plan. If your plan doesn’t work and/or something falls out of place, you shouldn’t get discouraged and give up. Instead, simply try another solution. It’s never easy to self-manage a mental illness, especially if you consider yourself an optimist. However, with the help of this guide, you should be able to start taking care of your mental illness and take the necessary steps to make it more manageable for yourself. Now, you should be able to handle anything that comes your way. How do you handle negative thoughts and make sure you are grateful for being alive? Please comment below and let us know!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/life/4-ways-of-handling-a-mental-illness-for-the-optimists/ Have you had a goal you begin to work toward only to run out of steam? Do you know what you need to do to get to where you want to be, but the necessary work feels overwhelming? “Small Victories” is the method to eliminate procrastination, dramatically increase productivity, and to make every part of the process not just bearable, but fun. The journey from novice to rockstar is filled with a thousand small victories. Each victory increases your skill, your confidence, your positive expectation, and is ultimately the only way to really do something truly great. Imagine you have a band in which everything was fun- fun to practice, fun to get together and create. The first victory was writing your first song. Afterwards, some friends come to watch you practice, and they cheer you on giving you another boost. Then you play your first show, do your first band photoshoot, and create a band website. After all this hard work, you record your first song as a band, have your first major show, your first tour, and develop the best thing so far which are your first true fans. Each victory gives you the energy to get to the next victoryIf you told the kid, it was going to take ten years of work to get to the end goal, without celebrating the small important victories in between, it would be illogical for any human to hunker down and work 10 years to get there. So how is this relevant? When starting a business or following your dream, incentivizing yourself with small victories will make you far more likely to make you continue on to your end goal. Without it, your willpower only lasts so long. The small victories are the positive fuel to make it to the next milestone. You create small victories by finding a way to interact with people as a way to have an impact even if it’s small. For example, when people try to start businesses, often they try to get everything together before selling their first product. It could be months or years of work before they are at the level of their competition.
Say you’re creating a bakery, it could be a year before anyone tried your first baked good if you go the traditional brick and mortar route without any small victories. This comes with great financial cost and energy. You also lose out on the opportunity to improve your craft, your products, your image and your connections with others who can take your business to greater heights. However, if you go with the method of small victories instead, you would start by creating a cult following amongst friends and family with your decadent treats. Next, you would bake them at home and sell them at local events, farmers markets, and maybe even at local businesses. This can give you the opportunity to create a strong local and social media following well before the opening of your first actual store. Work and effort without small victories lead to burnoutWe need to build rewards along the way into our endeavors, because this provides encouragement to keep going. Each moment is a separate gift, an experience where something was fulfilled, where something was accomplished, no matter how small, and being a recluse until the grand unveiling will have so many missed opportunities along the way. Small victories are also an opportunity to develop your skills, get feedback – positive or constructive – and considerably increase opportunities. Small victories increase your credibility by showing a track record and the trajectory you’re on by increasing your ability to attract investors and partners.
The idea of celebrating small victories can be applied to any subject. In weight loss, for instance, seeing pounds melt away will give you the positive mindset to continue and even improve the choices you make to enhance your physique. Sharing your success with others will bring in the element of positive encouragement. It can also motivate others to come with you on the journey. Your small victories can inspire others to start their own journey. What small victory did you achieve today which will bring you a step closer to your goals? Let us know below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/how-to-use-the-small-victories-method-to-avoid-burning-out/ Most of what limits us as people are personal beliefs based on past experiences, or unconscious conditioning that we have been programmed with or picked up during our education or development. The people I look up to and respect the most are those who have managed to unlearn what society has taught them by way of conditioning and have created their own lives in line with what works for them. They still operate from a space of personal integrity and caring towards others and they can see the limitations in unquestioningly following what society has taught them. They have learned to listen to and follow their own internal guidance and values, create successful habits and win at life. Some common beliefs that I’ve noticed trip up my clients and students are as follows:1. Expecting anything from others, life and the world“If it is to be, it is up to me” is my motto. That’s not to say I don’t collaborate with others, contribute and receive from them, but I am the driving force in my Universe. I know when others do something for me, an opportunity comes my way or something great happens. It’s always my legwork that’s created that association, opening or sense of gratitude or invitation and it’s something to be deeply grateful for and not to take for granted. TIP: Look for inspiration that resonates for you and act from that space
2. Functioning from thinking at the exclusion of our intuitionMany of us have learned to mistrust our instincts instead of acknowledging what feels right deep down in our gut (which may offer seem counter to what we think about a situation). The term ‘stinking thinking’ exists for a reason. If logical thinking alone worked for running our lives, none of us would have problems. Instead, combine logic with your inner awareness and appropriate action to become unstoppable. TIP: How can you begin to listen to that powerful voice inside, starting today? 3. Pushing aside our soul whispers because they seem too hardHow often have you ignored a constant urge to do something new/different because you couldn’t quite fathom why that was a good choice, because it felt messy or risky or just didn’t fit with what you have decided is best for you right now? Staying stuck and perhaps miserable is safer and may seem easier than hacking a track that no one’s ever taken before, but the cost of ignoring our knowing seems to grow over time in terms of stagnation, regret and always wondering. TIP: What if being truly you and following what excites you most is the only thing you’re supposed to do? 4. Not realizing that feelings are based on conditioningWe tend to associate particular emotions with how we think about certain events/outcomes because of past negative experiences or due to conditioning, even when it’s not actually true for us. When we are in our truth, our thoughts are of such a positive/freeing nature that not much can throw us off centre. TIP: What is the underlying belief in a current difficult situation that you haven’t acknowledged? How can you change your beliefs about that person/situation to give you a different outcome? 5. Having Expectations of others based on their ‘Role’People often expect family members/partners/friends or colleagues to behave in accordance with the values and behaviours that they have assigned to those roles. For example “Family must love me”, or “colleagues must be supportive”. In an ideal world these things are always true, but more often than not, our belief just hinders our ability to deal with the reality in this individual situation. People are only capable of being who they are and acting from that space regardless of their role in our lives. TIP: Always assume who others are based on their behaviour not their relationship to you.
6. Expecting others to have the same values/capabilities as usPeople always show us who they are. Some of the most stuck clients I see, are those who repeatedly ignore who someone else is based on who they want the other person to be. People will always be who they are and do what works for them, regardless of your preferences. It’s good to understand why we are invested in someone being that way and to provide ourselves with that thing, instead of seeking it through others. TIP: When you see people for who they are instead of who you would like them to be life gets exponentially easier and you will have so much energy for you. 7. Thinking that the personal development journey is too hardRealizing we have a lot of work to do is no reason not to start. A year from now, 12 months will have passed whether or not you have grown and developed the way you know you can. Personal growth can be tough, however can you live with staying the way you are now and depriving yourself of the opportunity to reach your greatness? Who are you to play small and not share your potential with the world? I get it, you might put all that work in and it might be for nothing, but it’s extremely doubtful if you are able to be honest with yourself, devote a bit of time to the journey and follow some great mentors that you are the one person this stuff won’t work for. TIP: Who do you want to look back and say you were able to have been in this lifetime? Now start doing what it takes to be that person. Identifying and recognizing unhelpful conditioning and beliefs and changing them in a way that works for you is valuable process to master. It takes courage to look beyond we have been conditioned to believe, seek our truth and live according to that and the rewards are phenomenal. What are some limiting beliefs that are holding you back? Comment below!Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/life/7-common-but-unhelpful-conditioned-beliefs-and-how-you-can-change-them/ How did Usain Bolt become so successful? He seems superhuman, doesn’t he? Richard Branson, Steve Jobs, Paul Bocuse… all these people have something special in them. They became the stars in their niche. Have you ever wondered why? No, they do not have any superhuman capacity. They are simple people, just like you and I. They, too, had flaws. Their mindset, however, is what set them apart. If you want to win in your career and in life, generally, you need the mindset of a winner. You have to think like a true champion, so you’ll overcome your flaws and emphasize your strengths. So how do you set the mindset to win? Here are 5 suggestions to get you started:1. When You Can’t Achieve a Goal, Get HelpHave you heard of Paul Bocuse? He was one of the most famous chefs of his time, and he was named as the chef of the century. This is a good example of the point we’re about to make. Even the best are not almighty, they have to learn from someone. Paul Bocuse learned from another famous chef. He constantly worked to improve his skills and he learned along the way. The lesson is: you cannot do everything on your own. This is the first thing you have to do: learn and find the right person to learn from. Are there any books by the champions of your chosen niche? Get them and read them. Can you get a mentor? Of course, you can! Start connecting with people on LinkedIn. Your alumni network is a great source of mentorship opportunities, too. Don’t be afraid to reach out and say that you want to learn from someone.
2. Work on Your ResilienceHere’s the most important life lesson you’ll ever learn: things don’t always go as expected. When you strive towards a particular goal, the chances of failure are real. When Usain Bolt started training, he wasn’t the fastest man on Earth. He worked towards that goal and he was resilient enough to go through all the obstacles he faced. We couldn’t possibly assume that such success came easily for him. The journey towards a successful life is not a straight line, it’s a bumpy road full of difficulties and setbacks. The average person would give up along the way, but a champion would stay resilient. It’s the mindset that makes a true difference. The good news is that the more obstacles you overcome, the more resilient you become. 3. FocusWhat do you want in your career and in your life? This is not something that can go with the flow. You cannot simply live your life one random day after another and expect great things to come your way. You have to focus on particular goals and work your way up there. Ken Chenault, CEO of American Express, has a nice tip for everyone who wants to become successful: “Dedicate yourself to a core set of values. Without them, you will never be able to find personal fulfillment, and you will never be able to lead effectively.” Simple and straight to the point, right? So set your goals! Find that major goal you want to achieve and break it up into smaller achievements. Then, start accomplishing things on a daily basis. You need to devote your life to achieving that goal. 4. Be BoldSteve Jobs wasn’t focused on getting an average job, achieving average results and living an average life. He had big dreams and bold goals. All successful people have something in common at the starting point, a bold dream. Being afraid to dream big is a huge mistake. Set your imagination free! What’s the biggest thing you’d like to achieve? If you believe in yourself and you start working towards that goal one day after another, you’ll unlock your true potential. You’ll realize that not many things are impossible. You can achieve much more than you believe you’re capable of.
5. If You Fall, Get Back UpHave you ever wondered why Richard Branson became so successful? The answer is simple: never gave up, no matter what hardships he faced. His first company didn’t make money. The test flight of Virgin Atlantic Airlines almost crashed because of a flock of birds. Virgin Cola, his soda company, failed miserably. He almost got himself killed during his trip around the world. Richard Branson has done many things, but do you know what he never did? Give up. No matter how serious the failure was, he always found the strength to get back up on his feet and carry on with life. That’s the mindset of a champion! Never allow yourself to get disappointed from failure. Do not fall back into average just because your big dream doesn’t seem to be working. Failure is not a big deal. It’s just part of the journey, and everyone has to face it. If you carry on, you’ll find success along the way. So you want to be a champion? You better start working towards that goal without wasting any time. The first step is changing your mindset. Hopefully, the tips above inspired you to do that.Image courtesy of Twenty20.com from https://addicted2success.com/success-advice/setting-up-your-mindset-to-win-how-to-achieve-success-in-your-life-and-career/ |
ABOUT USHi I am Stacy Klein. I like swimming and i enjoy being organized and strive to become more efficient every day. Archives
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